Book Eight

“I want JK Rowling to say that the epilogue was crap, 'cause we all know it was crap. And I want JK Rowling to say that Voldemort had a son, and the story's just begun. And I want JK Rowling to say that's writing book eight!” ~ Hank Green

Ok, so that might not all be true. I do NOT want JKR to say that Voldemort had a son. That sounds like a cheesy RP plot someone might come up with...actually, I think that WAS a cheesy RP plot a *lot* of people came up with.

But hold up. Did Kat just quote Hank Green...? Yep, I did. I like Hank's music, especially “Book Eight” though I still will hold adamantly to the fact that I am not a “nerdfighter”. I do not fight nerds; I do not fight because I am a nerd; I do not fight at all. So, “nerd”, yes; “nerdfighter”, no.

Anyway, on with the post! I was asked a few weeks ago what I say I wanted if a miracle were to happen and JKR announced she was writing another book in the series before another miracle happened and she decided to call up Kat, a random fan, to see what she wanted for the next book.

And the simple answer is that I don't know. I've operated under the idea that the next big Potter book would be The Scottish Book (the HP encyclopedia she's been promising) that hearing she was writing another novel would completely throw me!

I would LOVE a book about the founders of Hogwarts! I have to admit that I don't just like to read fan fiction about the founders because there isn't as much harm that can be done to the canon by inexperienced fan fiction writers, the entire idea of a group of four people putting together something as magnificent and overwhelming as Hogwarts is fascinating! When you add that to the fact that we know little to nothing about the founders, I get all excited by learning more about that particular era, even if it has nothing to do with the founders and just some random ancient magical folk.

I would DEFINITELY love a real life (and non-Rita Skeeter'd) version of The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore to learn more about this great man, though a version of this for Voldemort or Grindewald wouldn't be unwelcome either!

I would prefer if it had nothing to do with the next generation. I would be severely disappointed if it did. (I mean, I'd still read it because it's HP, but I'd still be mad.) I hated everything to do with the epilogue. As I said before, when I found it online before the release of DH, I thought it was a cheap trick by some ill-adept fan fiction writer about what they wanted JKR to write at the end. When, with a sinking feeling, I saw it word-for-word at the end of DH, I immediately cried out of sheer disappointment. It felt like she gave up at the end and just did what everyone wanted in the most cheesy way possible (though I know she had all that planned from the beginning, it wasn't well done at ALL). If she were to continue that and tell us all about the lives of Lily Luna, James Sirius, and the unfortunately and comically named Albus Severus, I would be, in a word, pissed. I don't care about them! They ruined the entirety of the last book for me having to read about them at the vulnerable time when the book was wrapping up. They stand for sheer disappointment that was the epilogue. Why prolong the torture?

If it were a book about the marauders, I wouldn't cry, but I wouldn't be overly excited either. I swear I'm pretty much the only HP fan that doesn't absolutely love that era. I mean, I love me some Sirius and some Remus, but I don't really care much about when they were young and in school, perhaps because they all seem egotistical and annoying. If it were after they graduated, I might be marginally more interested.

So, while I do agree that “I really do think there's an unwritten story, and I think it's time to put fingers to keys for book eight”, I am quite picky about what I would want.

I must also add that during all the hype leading up to the Pottermore announcement, a lot of people were holding tightly to the odd notion that JKR was going to completely lie to us and produce the book that her people very clearly said wasn't coming. After reading the 10 billionth post like this, I started thinking more about what I would want in said miraculous book. Hence the post.

And speaking of Pottermore, I was going to do another post entirely about my reaction to her announcement, but I felt kind of...blah about it. I think it's one of those things I will have to see and experience for myself before I love or hate it. I can't really say I have an opinion either way right now, though I'd love to be a beta for it!